FREE ESSAY ON PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS

PERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS

Improving personal communications is very important to today in the fast moving world. The
communication process is very important, it is estmated that 80 percent of messages get
deport" For better results replace "You statements" with "I statements." Say I'm
concerned...That will bring the person off of the defensive approch. Also discuss things
as they happen with out waitng. When you wait things can be losted or forgotten. If you
work them out early it will be much easier for you and the other person. Select the right
ime and place to discuss something. Like and office away from co-workers or customers or
busy phones. So that person has your full attention. 
Overwhelming other with your self disclosure is not a good idea. You shoudl be open, but
don't share too much, too fast. Before sayign anything consider these three things. 1. Is
the statement true? 2. Is the statement necessary? 3. Is the statement kind? Be aware of
your nonverble cues. Cues give you away easy. Example, hesitation in your voice,
expression of doubt on your face, and a long pause. The emotion you give is how intrested
you are.
doing this their is filters example. Sender (You)-----Sender Filters *Semantics{upersonal
communications is very important to today in the fast moving world. The communication
process is very important, it is estmated that 80 percent of messages get distorted or
lost. Impersonal communication is not always the right way to speak with people. This
would be fax, e-mail,bulliton board, voice mail and manuals etc. Interpersonal
communications is a verbal exchange of thoughts or imformation between two or more
people, and through this it allows people to give feedback on what they have to say or
ideas they would like to share. In Communications theirs always (You) Message Sender.
Next, Message (Directions) Next, (Friend) Message Receiver. By doing this their is
filters example. Sender (You)-----Sender Filters *Semantics, *Emotion, *Attitudes, *Role
Expectations, *Gender Bias.----Message----Receiver Filtes, *Semantics, *Emotion,
*Attitudes, *Role Expectations, *Gender Bias.---Receiver (Plumber) Semantic is a word
that will ahve different meanings to different people. Example WordProcessing to some
people that might mean type writer. To me it means Computer typing. Emotions play a big
part on what kinda feed back you get when talk to someone. If a CEO, comes into a
busniess meeting and starts yelling and gives everyone a real big attitude. The people
who have to come up with ideas aren't going to say much. If they have an idea they will
probably won't say it at all. That also falls into Attitudes. When working in a company
you have to find a role. What I mean by a role is you have to find a common ground of
what you have to get done and do it. There will be some gender bias in every company or
work place, you just need to find something you like and stick to it. Nonverbal Messages
play a huge part. Example if you are the boss and someone is trying to give you an idea
they came up with and you are not giving them eye contact, a dirty facial expression, and
uncomfotable gestures. The person will feel that you could careless.
When in a work enviroment everyone needs some kind of personal space. When provided
personal space people work better and easier and more relaxed. When talking to someone
send clear messages try to keep out all the filters. So people won't be misunderstood.
Use words carefully, example use words that are simple, clear and cannot be mistaken. Use
repetion when possible send the people an e-mail or leave a message, that will get there
attention. Develop listening skill, everytime you talk with someone you're working on
listening skills. Apply that to the next person. Active listening 
you're seeing and listening to what they have to say. Empathic listening is good to a
company becuase it gives a employee someone to talk to too about personal problems.
Here's some steps 1. Avoid being judgmental. 2. accept what is said. 3. Be patient. This
will help a company in a big way. You want to create a climate that encourages upward
communication. Have the people below at the bottom give ideas and partisapate in some
meets. High Tech communication is a big part on keeping in touch with employees "virual
offices", "Telecommuting", and "E-mail."
There are four diffenerent communication styles, the 1st one is, Emotive Style, 2nd one
is Director Style, 3rd one is Reflective Style, and the 4th one is Supportive Style. The
upper-right-hand quadrant combines high sociavillity and high dominance. This is
characteristic of emotive style of communication (Figure out of the book 3.6) An example
of the emotive type of person is comedian Jay Leno. Roise O'Donnell also projects an
outspoken, enthusiastic abd stimualtiang style. Sandra Bullock, shows emotive style by
displaying laughter at herself in an imformal atmosphere. Here's three verbal and
nonverbal clues that identifly the emotive person: 1. Displays action- oriented behavior.
2. Likes informality. 3. Possesses a natural peruasiveness.
Director style. The lower right hand quadrant represents a commuication style that
combines high dominance and low sociabillity. Example, Television interviewer Barbara
Walters and house speaker Newt Gingrich project the director style. They have been
described as frank, assertive, and very determined. Some behavior displayed by director
include the following. 1. Projects a serious attitude. 2. Express strong opinions. 
3. May project indifference.
Reflective Style. The lower left hand quadrant of communication style model features a
combination of low dominace and low sociabillity. The reflective person is usually quiet,
enjoys spending time alone, and does not make decisions quickly. Albert Einstein, Alan
Greenspan, Jimmy Carter, all of these people are in reflective styles. Here's some
behaviors of Reflective style. 1. Express opinioned in a formal, deliberate manner. 2.
Seems to be preoccupied. 3. Prefers orderliness.
Supportive style. The upper left hand quadrant combines low dominance and high
sociabillity. People who fit into to this style tend to be coopetrative, patient, and
attentive. This behavior style includes. 1. Listening attentively. 2. Avoids the use of
power. 3. Makes and express decisions in a thoughtful, deliberate manner. I'm more
Reflective Style more than anything. 
Ethical Choices, always includes these six things. Trustworthiness; Be honest and
sincere. Don't deceive or mislead and never betray a trust. Respect; Be courteous and
polite by being appreciative and accepting of differences. Responsibility; Be accountable
for your actions. Don't make excuses or take credit for other work. Fairness; Treat all
people fairly, be openminded and listen to opposing ponits of view. Caring; Show you care
about other through kindness, caring, sharing. Citizenship; Play by the rules and obey
the laws. How personal values are formed. Five part valuing. 
1. Thinking, learn to think for yourself. 2. Feelings, go with your gut feeling. If you
think it's wrong it probably is. 3. Communicating, values and choices are much easier
when directed in an easy way to understand. 4. Choosing, your values must be freely
selected with no outside pressure. 5. Acting, think about what your going to do before
you do it. If you follow these five steps you'll be on your way to good ethics.
There are my influences on us, including Religious Groups, Schools, Media, Family, the
people we admire. These enviromental influnces can only be the rightway if you beleive
its the right way. If you keep an openmind that the only one who can give you ehical
choices is you. You might be better off.
With changing times ethical choices change with the social norm. But again it might not
always be the right way to view things. You ahve to find ethical choices in yourself.
Through all this in the job place you might have to work with someone you disagree with
there ethical choice or value. You have to find a common ground between you too. Talk
about something you both like or believe in. Try not to bring up values, or opinions. To
have ethical employees the company has to have ethical values also. If the company is
cheating people what kind of values does that show the employees? None. Why can't they
steal if the company does? Whatever the company does affects the employees in all parts,
and levels. When a company is running with values and showing that to the employees at
all levels the company will run smoother and a lot more production. "Nothing is more
powerful for emloyees than to see their mangers behave according to their expressed
values and standards" Dan Rice and Craig Dreilinger.
Attitudes affect you everywhere you go and who you meet. Especialy at a work place.
There's a chain that comes along with attitude. Values--Attiudes--Behaviors. Attitudes
are usually form from childhood experence with maybe yelling in a house hold or Mother
doing everthing and Dad doing nothing. It affects you as you get older. People in your
life around you as a child will shape your attitude for when you get older. Rewards and
punishment play a huge role in what your attitude maybe. Example if you as a child was
told to clean your room and you did and you got rewared. But now all the time you clean
your room you expect to be rewarded. Different caltures have different attiutes. Example
Asain students study harder than American students because there we brought up to study
hard, no job until they have reached end of school. As for American students layed back,
and have jobs, but has to handle both.
Attuitudes don't always have to be with an outside issue this can be brought up in the
work place. Example, your manger comes into work late and leave early, or calls in to go
to a golf match. This kinda attitude by the manger sahpes the attitude for the employees.
Being a team player is more valueable to a company than being someone who knows more.
Being a team player concist of not always ask yourself what's in it for me, or always
complaining to do soemthing when asked to cover for someone. Another thing that brings
good attitude is usually good health. If you eat healthly you usually have more energy to
give more, and you feel good about yourself. Many companies are realizing employees
attitudes are affecting how things are run and production levels. If a company has
everyone from the bottom up include ideas, and hear ideas. The emlopyees feel needed to
get a job done. When companies are orginized the employees feel they are needed a company
will run better than ever.
Building trust, and selfdisclosure. Selfdisclosure is a process of letting people know
what you think, feel or want. Building trust starts by showing someone something you said
you would do, not by just saying. It's one of the most impotant ways you let yourself be
known. Selfdescription is nonthreating information like your age, favorite food, where
you were born, etc. There are benifits gained by Selfdisclosure. Increased accuracy in
communication, Reduction of stress, Increased selfawareness, and Stronger realtionship.
Johari Window. Is a model that shows there is some information you know about yourself
and other information you are not aware of. There is some information about you, that you
are not aware of that others are. This model shows that in different windows. It's a box
with four quadrants in it. Top left 1 Open, Top right 2 Blind, Bottom left 3 Hidden, and
bottom right 4 unknown. The top of the intire box is information known to other, and the
bottom half is information not known to others. From the top left to the right is
information known to yourself. The right information not known to yourself. The open area
is your public self, or awareness area. This is information you don't mind admitting to
yourself. The Blind is an area that others are aware of that you aren't. Getting feedback
about this area can be helpful. The hidden is an area that contains information about you
that you know, but other do not. The unknown is an area made up of things unkown to you
and to others. Example unrecongnized talent, unconscious motives, or early childhood
memories that influence your behavior. This window never completely disapears. As you
grown older the window cahnges but not that much. 
Contructive criticism is good because it shows you what you can't see. But there are
certain ways to use it. Always avoid using "You." example, "You didn't complete the task